I know I know I am a huge dork, but I really do like to follow the rules. I dont know how this started because as far as I can remember I was always trying to break the rules and see how far I could push it with my parents, teachers, principals, basically anyone in charge. But sometime after college I decided to become a rule follower. Maybe it had to do with the job that I had. Being a manager at Abercrombie and Fitch you quickly learn to play by their rules or have hell to pay. I liked my job, I dont know why but I did. I worked like 80 hour weeks and spent all my free time sleeping, sometimes sleeping in the store so I could get more work done instead of going home in between shifts. Even though the rules were horrible I was convinced that I wanted to work for them forever. So somewhere along the way I decided that all rules needed to be followed and it just kinda stuck.
So now being a mom I can tell you that I have poured over books, reading about how children should be raised, how often they need to take naps, what kind of food to give them so they will eat healthy and like it, religiously gone to check ups and followed all the immunizations that are recommended. If something happens that I dont know how to deal with, my sons nurse is the first person I call (after consulting with the hubbie of course). The poor lady, she has talked to me so much on the phone that when I call now she knows my voice. So far I have been successful at getting my children to follow the RULES ACCORDING TO MOMMY. Steve also follows them because he has seen my bad side and likes to humor me (I love you Steve!!!!).
Well this week has thrown me for a loop. All of the sudden Asher has decided he doesnt like naps anymore even though his pediatrician said he is too young to quit taking naps (wait this is breaking a doctors rule!!!). I thought I could win by taking the paci away which is what I let him have almost as a bribe so he would take a nap expecting him to scream and cry for it and then I would give it back and he would take a nap. We have tried taking it away a few times before and it seems like he just holds on to it even more so but not this time, he is just done with that too. I am not ready for no nap days, I need my break my quiet time, and my nap too. And it isnt like it is in any book what to do when your child quits taking naps but is cranky most of the day because they are sleep deprived and how to get them to sleep even though they dont want to. And what excuse do I use to call the doctor and see if this is really ok. So I am stumped, my poor little man pretty much passes out in the bed on contact with his pillow at night because he is so tired, and I have been doing the same. And the thing I have had to learn this week which is so hard for me because not only do I enjoy following the rules, I am kind of OCD when it comes to enforcing rules, is that my kid is not going to follow the rules.
So no matter how mad I get or upset, my little man is marching to the beat of his own drum. And I can try all I want to change that, but then I look and see that I am not letting him be himself. The whole reason I fought so hard against all rules was because it didnt let me be me. It didnt mean I was a bad person because I thought so many rules were stupid, I just didnt think they needed to apply to me because I rarely got in trouble (yes I the trouble maker was also the goodie two shoes). And now I have to let my son break some rules, and even though I would rather him break another rule in the HOW TO LET CHILDREN GROW UP BOOK, I will settle on this one.
P.S. you guys can all thank my husband for most of the grammer errors being corrected!!!
